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Thread: How do you handle potential physical confrontations?

  1. #1
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    How do you handle potential physical confrontations?

    I was driving home from the hardware store tonight and turned left at the light on to my street. As I get to the crosswalk, I see a guy about to take a step off the curb. So, I stop in the intersection about 10 feet away from him, we catch eyes, he just stands there so I continue turning. As soon as I pass he yells out "Pedestrians have the right away $#@!!" It took me a second to register what he said and then I slammed on the brakes. I rolled down the window and said "I stopped to let you pass man." (He doesn't have the ROW at an unmarked crosswalk when I have a green light) And he starts ranting again on how I almost hit him and how I'm an $#@!. Then he says "You better get going before I kick your ass!" I argue with him more, he starts charging my car and stops dead in his tracks halfway. So obviously, he is trying to intimidate me. I unbuckled my seat belt to get out of the car and confront him but my wife stopped me. He started walking back to the crosswalk and then back to me. I decided to drive away slowly and continue on my way while he continued yelling and calling me a pussy.

    Part of me wanted to scrap. I may not have beaten the guy, but at least I'd still have my self-respect. The logical side said to just let it go and nothing good will come from this. You're a dad and showing up to work with signs of fighting is not the best idea when you consistently meet with clients. More than likely, it would have been a yelling match where we both walked away. 9 out of 10 times, it's simply a macho exercise.

    When things escalate to the point where they get physical, how do you handle it? Do you walk away or get into it? I would never take the first swing, but I'm certainly going to defend myself if someone leaves me no choice.

  • #2
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    How do you handle potential physical confrontations?

    I don't let them escalate to the point they might get physical. In your case, for example, I would never have stopped to talk back to the guy.

  • #3
    Pistol whip with a 1911

  • #4
    Worldstar! And have your wife turn the fone sideways, pls.

  • #5
    Quote Originally Posted by spankytoes View Post
    I was driving home from the hardware store tonight and turned left at the light on to my street. As I get to the crosswalk, I see a guy about to take a step off the curb. So, I stop in the intersection about 10 feet away from him, we catch eyes, he just stands there so I continue turning. As soon as I pass he yells out "Pedestrians have the right away $#@!!"
    That's where your story should have ended.

  • #6
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    Uh, not even remotely getting in a situation where I could have one with some guy on whom the only data point I have is that he's walking across a street where inbound cars have a green light, especially when I'm in a car, and I have a person I care about with me.

    Waiting in a parking lot a guy knocks on my window to ask for something (money). I look pissed and reach one hand towards the compartment in the door and crack the window with the other.

  • #7
    I put them on ignore or just a quick shoulder check.

  • #8
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    I always assume that everyone in public is bat$#@! crazy. I avoid getting into confrontations with others as a result of it.

    When I was a teenager, I flipped off a guy who cut me off on the highway. About 120 miles later, I stopped at a McDonald's to pee. The other driver was in the bathroom, recognized me by my ballcap, and offered to cut my finger off.

  • #9
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    For one thing, drive on and fugeddaboutit.
    Descalate and forget about proving your manhood with some moron.


    If the other guy forces a FTF confrontation and still gets aggressive & swings at me, I'm shooting him. Old people tend to die when getting hit & falling down, especially with serious bone injury at the very least or maybe a stroke. And if forced to shoot, it will be with this:



  • #10
    benevolent dictator blacklab has disabled reputation blacklab's Avatar
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    Last one I had I just walked away, even though I would have easily won, you never know what will happen. I may have ended up killing him accidentally and gone to jail for a while.

    In your case you don't know if the guy has a gun or a knife and it's easy to drive away.

  • #11
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    Sweep the leg, walk away.

  • #12
    Quote Originally Posted by MikeGundy'sRant View Post
    I always assume that everyone in public is bat$#@! crazy. I avoid getting into confrontations with others as a result of it.

    When I was a teenager, I flipped off a guy who cut me off on the highway. About 120 miles later, I stopped at a McDonald's to pee. The other driver was in the bathroom, recognized me by my ballcap, and offered to cut my finger off.
    Recognized your "ball cap"

  • #13
    asshat HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93 might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? HornsForever'93's Avatar
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    Strike First, Strike Hard, No Mercy!!

  • #14
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    Have your wife get out and fight him.

  • #15
    I'm not in high school, so I just walk away. The only time I would ever get involved in a physical confrontation is to defend myself, my family, or my friends. I'd rather be humiliated or have someone call me a pussy than get stabbed or shot. Who cares?

  • #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by FCHorn View Post
    Recognized your "ball cap"
    I was a big Sawyer Brown fan back then. It was a bright green John Deer hat, which stands out.

  • #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by bedeviledegg View Post
    That's where your story should have ended.
    In hindsight, yes. It was a combination of me stopping in the middle of the intersection with cars coming, him not moving and having him yell at me while I was driving off when he was clearly in the wrong that got my adrenaline going. $#@! that guy. Shut your mouth and continue going on your way. It's not like he had to do a barrel roll into the bushes to escape physical harm. Stop being a little bitch because you felt inconvenienced for two seconds out of your life and dealing with it in a chicken$#@! way not expecting to be called out on it.

    Plus, I'm an argumentative $#@!.

  • #18
    There are very few situations that I feel like I would wind up in a confrontation. Most of the time, I will ignore it and go on my way. Usually I just wave. I can talk my way out of a lot of crap too. You don't know how crazy people are now, or whether or not they are armed or trained. Let it ride. We were always told it takes a bigger man to walk away.

  • #19
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    Uh, yeah, you should have done no more than tell him to $#@! himself and drive off. Your desire to engage him is juvenile and selfish. Why do you give a $#@! what he said? The upside for you is, what, exactly? The downside is having some crazy MF kick your ass or worse.

  • #20
    Quote Originally Posted by MikeGundy'sRant View Post
    I was a big Sawyer Brown fan back then. It was a bright green John Deer hat, which stands out.
    He was sure impressed with you...

  • #21
    I find most "tough guys" don't have much to lose so they're not worried about the consequences of fighting or assault. Me? I've got a wife, kids, and good job that I would likely lose if arrested.

  • #22
    The older I get the more I just let $#@! go. My life is good so why get into a pissing match with a stranger.

  • #23
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    Walk away, or in your case just drive away. In this case it isn't worth the consequences.

  • #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by spankytoes View Post
    I was driving home from the hardware store tonight and turned left at the light on to my street. As I get to the crosswalk, I see a guy about to take a step off the curb. So, I stop in the intersection about 10 feet away from him, we catch eyes, he just stands there so I continue turning. As soon as I pass he yells out "Pedestrians have the right away $#@!!" It took me a second to register what he said and then I slammed on the brakes. I rolled down the window and said "I stopped to let you pass man." (He doesn't have the ROW at an unmarked crosswalk when I have a green light) And he starts ranting again on how I almost hit him and how I'm an $#@!. Then he says "You better get going before I kick your ass!" I argue with him more, he starts charging my car and stops dead in his tracks halfway. So obviously, he is trying to intimidate me. I unbuckled my seat belt to get out of the car and confront him but my wife stopped me. He started walking back to the crosswalk and then back to me. I decided to drive away slowly and continue on my way while he continued yelling and calling me a pussy.

    Part of me wanted to scrap. I may not have beaten the guy, but at least I'd still have my self-respect. The logical side said to just let it go and nothing good will come from this. You're a dad and showing up to work with signs of fighting is not the best idea when you consistently meet with clients. More than likely, it would have been a yelling match where we both walked away. 9 out of 10 times, it's simply a macho exercise.

    When things escalate to the point where they get physical, how do you handle it? Do you walk away or get into it? I would never take the first swing, but I'm certainly going to defend myself if someone leaves me no choice.
    If you are going to get into it, I suggest you change this. I got my nose broke by letting someone else take the first swing. Most fights are won with the first punch if it lands. That $#@! ain't going 10 rounds, if I don't win a fight in the first 30 seconds I'm about to take a beating lol.

    If you're going to fight...mean it. See Nolan Ryan vs Robin Ventura

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jkwellborn View Post
    He was sure impressed with you...
    My hat was loud. I was a 145 pound high school senior. A strong breeze could push me around.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Armybrat View Post
    /thread

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    Quote Originally Posted by Message Board User View Post
    I find most "tough guys" don't have much to lose so they're not worried about the consequences of fighting or assault. Me? I've got a wife, kids, and good job that I would likely lose if arrested.
    I agree with your thinking. Plus, getting my ass whipped in public would be pretty embarrassing.

  • #28
    Couple of things I learned in high school:

    1. Never, ever get in a fight without somebody neutral around to break it up if things go south. If he has friends there, and you have none- you cannot win and can get hurt bad.

    2. This is a good move for a one to one face off to de-escalate the situation: step closer, gently put your hand on his cheek, maybe even stroke it. Lean in (maybe put your forehead on his) and start telling him in a gentle voice just how badly you are going to $#@! him up. Use a lot of profanity. Generally, the other guy will be willing to walk away.

    3. If there is going to be a fight, hit first. Some call it a sucker punch. It's effective.

  • #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by HerkyJerky View Post
    If you are going to get into it, I suggest you change this. I got my nose broke by letting someone else take the first swing. Most fights are won with the first punch if it lands. That $#@! ain't going 10 rounds, if I don't win a fight in the first 30 seconds I'm about to take a beating lol.

    If you're going to fight...mean it. See Nolan Ryan vs Robin Ventura
    I disagree. You keep your distance and pick your spot. Difference is you need to know how to stay outside of range and cover up. Most people can't throw an accurate and hard punch. Most fights end up in the clinch and rolling around on the ground, whether its the school yard or a bar. They are messy haymakers.

  • #30
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    Don't get into them.



  • #31
    Quote Originally Posted by spankytoes View Post
    I was driving home from the hardware store tonight and turned left at the light on to my street. As I get to the crosswalk, I see a guy about to take a step off the curb. So, I stop in the intersection about 10 feet away from him, we catch eyes, he just stands there so I continue turning. As soon as I pass he yells out "Pedestrians have the right away $#@!!" It took me a second to register what he said and then I slammed on the brakes. I rolled down the window and said "I stopped to let you pass man." (He doesn't have the ROW at an unmarked crosswalk when I have a green light) And he starts ranting again on how I almost hit him and how I'm an $#@!. Then he says "You better get going before I kick your ass!" I argue with him more, he starts charging my car and stops dead in his tracks halfway. So obviously, he is trying to intimidate me. I unbuckled my seat belt to get out of the car and confront him but my wife stopped me. He started walking back to the crosswalk and then back to me. I decided to drive away slowly and continue on my way while he continued yelling and calling me a pussy.

    Part of me wanted to scrap. I may not have beaten the guy, but at least I'd still have my self-respect. The logical side said to just let it go and nothing good will come from this. You're a dad and showing up to work with signs of fighting is not the best idea when you consistently meet with clients. More than likely, it would have been a yelling match where we both walked away. 9 out of 10 times, it's simply a macho exercise.

    When things escalate to the point where they get physical, how do you handle it? Do you walk away or get into it? I would never take the first swing, but I'm certainly going to defend myself if someone leaves me no choice.
    No CR but with our current gun laws, you walk away. Assume everyone is armed.

  • #32
    Quote Originally Posted by rage-a-holic View Post
    /thread
    Screen name is ironic considering the subject matter.

    Why do some of you think it's OK to let a mere traffic stop escalate into a life or death issue?

  • #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aqua Buddha View Post
    Screen name is ironic considering the subject matter.

    Why do some of you think it's OK to let a mere traffic stop escalate into a life or death issue?
    It shouldn't. But that's the sad world we live in.

  • #34
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    I've been in plenty of fights, none of them were worth it and I regret them all. Luckily I don't have a criminal record but I have been to court before. Fighting serves no purpose except to get a criminal record or end up locked up

    Someone gets in my face, I laugh it off and walk away. Better to have hurt pride than a court date.

  • #35
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    So when the worst case scenario is you getting shot or stabbed by some lunatic with a hair trigger who clearly walks around looking for confrontation and the alternative is you laughing at some piece of $#@! as you drive home to $#@! your wife and never think about the loser on the street again, you actually consider the first opinion?

    How the $#@! does driving away from that hurt your pride? I'd never give it a second thought.

    Edit: same with the road ragers that refuse to let anyone merge. No big deal, I'll take the next spot. Or the $#@!s that drive up the shoulder way past the merge point and then cut in at the last possible second. Again, no big deal, not worth my emotion or stress.
    Last edited by heso; 01-11-2017 at 10:36 PM.

  • #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Swayze View Post
    It shouldn't. But that's the sad world we live in.
    Can you explain what you mean with this?

  • #37
    I only escalate when the other person is clearly a scared pussy.

  • #38
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    Throw a diet on them

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rocko20 View Post
    I've been in plenty of fights, none of them were worth it and I regret them all. Luckily I don't have a criminal record but I have been to court before. Fighting serves no purpose except to get a criminal record or end up locked up

    Someone gets in my face, I laugh it off and walk away. Better to have hurt pride than a court date.
    Exactly. And I had to go to court ordered "anger management" classes to get the charges dropped.

    Another check mark in the pro sobriety column.

    Also I learned it's never ok to shoulder check a cop.
    Last edited by BearSchlong; 01-11-2017 at 10:42 PM.

  • #40
    \_(ツ)_/ SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rocko20 View Post
    Someone gets in my face, I laugh yawn it off and walk away. Better to have hurt pride than a court date.
    fixed and agreed

  • #41
    asshat Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids might be a clever chap. or know the right people. know what i mean, nudge nudge? Ag with kids's Avatar
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    Doesn't it depend on how many airline miles/hotel points you get?

  • #42
    asshat Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze probably preboards planes Patrick Swayze's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SPII View Post
    Can you explain what you mean with this?
    I mean that people in the US (it seems more than other industrialized nations), are quick to grab a gun to end a conflict. From the thug to the "from my cold hand" crowd and everyone in between. People get into altercations and want to end it on top at any means necessary.

    Don't misunderstand me, I think guns and use of guns as self defense have their place. I believe in the right to own and use them to defends oneself, family and property. But when arguments or even fist fights turn to gun violence because someone is too proud to take an asswhoopin, that's $#@!ed up.

    Just my opinion.

  • #43
    asshat Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles Shaggy Gold Club Homercles's Avatar
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  • #44
    bunghole Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit grows his own roses Gucci_Suit's Avatar
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    I frequently advise friends to never get involved with someone who has nothing to lose. Then I have a couple of bourbons and question my own advice.

    Generally speaking, I don't get involved unless it's in defense of someone else. A buddy and I once river danced a guys face on a corner in manhattan because he was trying to fight a chick. That was probably 8 years ago and was my last "fight". Hopefully last ever... I have a lot to lose.

  • #45
    \_(ツ)_/ SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII Definitely Shaggy upper class SPII's Avatar
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    thanks, swayze. i'm with you. i think i misread/misinterpreted your post the first time.

  • #46
    asshat MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant Shaggy Gold Club MikeGundy'sRant's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BearSchlong View Post
    Exactly. And I had to go to court ordered "anger management" classes to get the charges dropped.

    Another check mark in the pro sobriety column.

    Also I learned it's never ok to shoulder check a cop.
    I never had a physical confrontation when I was drinking. I became a total $#@! and/or moron on here when I was drunk, and I terribly regret it.

    However, my drunk bravado never extended outside my house.

  • #47
    asshat F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250 has a gigantic e-peen. F250's Avatar
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    I'm 40, I am a man. I don't even get into confrontations at this age.

    Teens through early 20's was another story.

  • #48
    bunghole cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako is a rep whore. cheechako's Avatar
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    At my age, roll down the window and flip him off while driving away.

    In my youth, I would have most certainly been his Huckleberry. In my experience, you don't worry about the loud mouth tough guys. You worry about the quiet guys. They're the ones that will $#@! you up.

  • #49
    Met a really nice college kid about 20 years ago. Late one night he was driving home on the freeway after an evening downtown in the party district. Found himself driving next to another guy on his way home from a bar. At some point, they got angry with one another. Maybe somebody was tailgating, or somebody cut somebody off, or whatever.

    So they're driving down a mostly-empty highway and it escalates. Somebody flashes their brights. Somebody honks. A finger. $#@! you. Oh, yeah? $#@! you.

    The other guy waves. Pull over! $#@! yeah, I'll pull over.

    So this kid finds himself out of his car about to face down a stranger. Then, boom. Shotgun fired. Other car drives away. Kid lived, but he lost both eyes. Blind. Life forever altered.

    For what?

    That's why you just let it go.
    Last edited by Paul Wesley; 01-11-2017 at 11:04 PM.

  • #50
    in the situation of the OP I would not have even heard or cared what that idiot said my radio would have been up to loud and I would have kept rolling on

    it sounds like he was the type that was basically setting you up to scream at you....the best thing you can do with those types is roll on like they do not exist it makes them crazier

    the only time I has something like this happen in a while was pretty recently I stopped at a 7-11 to get something to drink and as I roll up a guy is walking up to the door

    he was a small guy probably about 5-7 at most and he steps in the door just as I am parking and he just stops right after he walks in the door he is probably an inch inside the door after it closes just standing there so I look at him as I am walking up to make sure he is not casing the place and his white Tshirt is tucked in and I see nothing printing and nothing in his back pockets

    he knows someone is about to walk in because I had just rolled up so I simply open the other door and walk in and immediately take a left up the aisle not giving him the chance for what I figured would be the "got a quarter"

    I grab two drinks and walk to the counter where he is being told he can't buy the grape blunt skin because he has no ID and he tries the "but I am in here all the time" and then the "he should recognize me" as the other clerk walks out of the back room to stock stuff and just ignores him as well

    so he gets denied and as he walks away he again just stops about an inch from that same door he walked in and just stands there

    I pay and start to leave and again the other door is free and clear so I just walk right past him and use that door and as I do he kicks my foot to try and trip me and mumbles "skuze me" and I basically just kept walking and ignored him and got in my truck

    I could have tried to run at him in my truck in the parking lot for fun.....I could have gone down the road and turned around and caught him walking to wherever he was going or driven at him

    I could have stopped just after it happened before getting into my truck and ask him WTF

    I am not a huge guy and I am not in great shape right now and I was in shorts and flip flops, but this idiot was probably 5-7 and #120 at the most, but he was clearly all wired up and edgy about something so I figured even if I did pick him up and body slam him he would just get back up and then I would have to fight.....I was thirsty, hungry and not in the mood to deal with a moron so I just ignored him and left

    it did make me consider what I would have done if I had my CHL (which I plan to get soon) or if I had a gun in the car (no need for a chl then) and my thoughts were I would have done the same thing just roll on no need to even ask him what his problem was and make his problem my problem

    best I can figure out he was just looking to fight someone for anything or possibly he hoped if he tripped me he could grab my wallet and out run me (easily would have) and when I did not fall down he was out of options
    Last edited by ButtFumble; 01-11-2017 at 11:10 PM.

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